Barons Daily Log8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A hike in Forestville State Park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got combed rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm -Fetched tennis balls in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Supper! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Chased a squirrel up a tree in the backyard ! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the cushion in my kennel! My favorite thing!
Excerpts from Simba's Daily Rant...Day 1983 of my captivity..My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects & something called a laser light. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates are fed some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards.There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree. The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now................
Hi TB - surprisingly it looks like Baron has the run of the household ... poor old Simba - who probably is only three = i.e. 21 - or does she have 9 years for our one? - still she looks pretty contented in repose ... cheers Hilary
ReplyDeleteWhat a fabulous read... I almost felt like reading it out loud so Charlie the cat could hear it but then I thought I'd better not tempt providence ....lolol.
ReplyDeleteFor sure, the two species are entirely different.
ReplyDeleteYou are so clever, TB. I love the comparison of your two furry friends. And laughed at them both. Thank you for the morning smiles. :-)
ReplyDeleteSo true. So very true. I laughed at the dog diary. :)
ReplyDeleteThat was so funny, so true and priceless. Dogs are so easy to read and please. Good thing we can't hear what goes on in a cats head but I am pretty sure you nailed it.
ReplyDelete:) You have had some great animal friends...no dog will ever replace Baron, I know you miss him.
ReplyDeleteHi to Mrs T and I hope you have a good Easter and enjoy spring if you get it there in the banana belt:)
Dear Troubtbirder, I so enjoyed this--laughed out loud. Chuckled. Chortled. And I still, even as I type this, have a smile on my face. I am the slave of three cats--as you know from reading my blog. And what Simba is muttering surely reflects their feelings at times! They must find some of my deeds dastardly! I truly enjoyed this immensely. Thank you--and what a handsome Baron and a beautiful marmalade Simba. Peace.
ReplyDeleteI read this out loud to Paul and we laughed until the tears ran down. It's just like our household! Especially the cat thinking the dog is "not the brightest bulb on the Christmas tree"! Thanks for the laughs.
ReplyDeleteAh, sweet Baron, just plain happy to be alive. We could learn a lot from that philosophy.
ReplyDeleteYou nailed it. You have me laughing out loud with this one.
ReplyDeleteHi Ray, Loved that "my favorite thing" for Baron. Have to agree with Ginnie's comment above!
ReplyDeleteExcellent.
ReplyDeleteBut my little Rusty Cat seems to have that "Favorite thing" attitude... well, except when his staff doesn't move quite quickly enough- or occasionally opens the wrong can.
The difference here is- dogs spoil you whereas you need to spoil the cat. Rusty said so.