There are many different of causes of dementia and memory loss , Alzheimer's diseaseis just one of them of them. It comes in various degrees and stages. Everyone is different they say. My mom had Alzheimer's where she repeated things endlessly and finally got very quiet and faded away in front of our eyes. It took Barb 10 years from her diagnosis of M. C. I.(Mild cognitive impairment) to severe memory loss, wandering, frustration, anger violence . Along the way were many calls to 911 police help ambulance rides and many stays to Mayo Clinic's St. Mary'sGenerose psychiatric facility and "secure lock ups. A memory care nursing home and then hospice were the final steps.
People react differently to the prospect of meeting and greeting someone in the final stages of dementia. How can you talk to such a person? They probably wouldn't even know you. So what's the point? Well they might not or they might and it wouldn't even be obvious was my experience. Smile a lot. Speak normally. Take your time. Don't patronize. If you get a smile or a nod you are having a conversation you'll feel better for it and so will the person you're visiting.
When visiting my grandmother with dementia I would often sit and just hold her hand. On the days she would speak I would just listen. It’s a difficult thing.
ReplyDeleteYou're right about the condition being different almost in every person. My neighbor became violent at times. It was hard for his wife to take but she was a saint and worked with him until the end.
ReplyDeleteWe went through Alzheimer’s with my grandpa over a period of several years. Thank you for sharing your experience in hopes that it will help someone along way.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad Carole shared her experience so that it could help others. Thank you for sharing yours as well.
ReplyDeleteGood post Ray. No experience there myself, but my kids have said they'd put me on an iceberg and kick it off from shore if it becomes an issue. Just a joke....maybe. Anyway, hope you are well. I'm ok.
ReplyDeleteMike
It is an odd thing. My dad didn't know if it was day or night, but he always knew me -- by name too.
ReplyDeleteGood advice. My Dad is struggling with memory problems, his short term memory is bad but can remember stuff form 80 years ago just fine:)
ReplyDeleteMy dad had dementia during his later years (he died at 93) but my sisters and I visited him three times a week, because there was something still inside him that we knew and loved.
ReplyDeleteGood advice. I have a neighbor in the beginning stages right now. We talk at least once a week for half an hour or more on the phone and in person more briefly. She is as far as I can see still sharp. But her daughter tells another story. I will take your advice if she does start to slip. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteHi Ray - always difficult ... I would visit various people with the challenge ... and do what felt right for them. Love the photo of you and Barbs = just lovely - cheers Hilary
ReplyDeleteThat's good advice. Sending you warm thoughts and prayers.
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