Ole Olson

  A  Minnesota farmer named Ole had a car accident.  He was hit  by a truck owned by the Eversweet Company.


In  court, the Eversweet Company's hot-shot attorney questioned him  thus: 'Didn't you say to the state trooper at the scene of the  accident, 'I'm fine?"


Olie  responded: 'vell, I'lla tell you vat happened dere.


I'd  yust loaded my fav'rit cow, Bessie, into da...


'I  didn't ask for any details', the lawyer interrupted.  'Just  answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident,  'I'm fine!'?'


Olie  said, 'vell, I'd yust got Bessie into da trailer and I vas drivin'  down da road.... '


The  lawyer interrupted again and said, 'Your Honor, I am trying to  establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told  the police on the scene that he was fine.  Now several weeks  after the accident, he is trying to sue my client.  I believe he  is a fraud.  Please tell him to simply answer the question.  '


By  this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Olie's answer and said  to the attorney: 'I'd like to hear what he has to say about his  favorite cow, Bessie'.


Olie  said: 'Tank you' and proceeded.  'Vell as I vas saying, I had  yust loaded Bessie, my fav'rit cow, into de trailer and was drivin'  her down de road vin dis huge Eversweet truck and trailer came  tundering tru a stop sign and hit me trailer right in da side by  golly.  I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da  udder ditch.  By yimminy yahosaphat I vas hurt, purty durn  bad, and didn't want to move.  An even vurse dan dat, I could  hear old Bessie a moanin' and a groanin'.  I knew she vas in  terrible pain yust by her groans.


Shortly  after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up.  He  could hear Bessie a moanin' and a groanin' too, so he vent over to  her.  After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out  his gun and shot her right between the eyes.


Den  da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and  said, 'How are you feelin'?'


'Now  wot da fock vud YOU say?'